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Submitted on
April 1, 2011


5,146 (5 today)
So due to the overwhelming requests to give harsh critiques, I've decided to open up The Reverend Dave's College of Ass-Kickery and Salacious Critiques. What is that you say? Let me explain.

The Rev. Dave's College Ass-Kickery and Salacious Critiques or R.D.C.A.S.C will be an online place were you can get an artistic ass kicking from a group of qualified professionals. For a nominal price your ass will be handed to you on a silver platter.

Price list includes:
For $10 one of our professionals will give you an overall assessment of your portfolio. This includes an intense artistic ass-banging of epic proportion. And suggestions on what you should work on and books and other artists you should look at and learn from.

For $20 All the above, plus an in depth critique of one piece of art that you choose. This includes drawing over you piece of defective art, showing you firsthand what you did wrong and how you can change it for the better.

For $50 All of the above, plus 5 more harsh in depth critiques.

For $100 Instead of an ass-kicking you'll receive an ASS-KISSING! That's right, we're talking about a stroke job that would make the gods jealous. Be the envy of all your friends when you show them Sean Murphy or Dan Panosian or Joe Jusko gushing all over your latest artistic masterpiece. Here's an example of what you'll receive..... "OMG! This artistic endeavor is one of the greatest pieces of art I've ever seen. You're like better than Frazetta, Rockwell, Kirby, Moebius and Liefield all rolled up into one. Someday I can only hope to be as good as you."
See? Something like that.

And of course, there's a money-back guarantee if there's nothing wrong with your art.

So save up your money. Details about where to send the money will be coming soon on this journal.
  • Mood: Neutral
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  • Drinking: A lot
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RedGeisha Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2011  Student Artist
This is the scariest shit I've ever heard of.
spikeyheadedfreak Featured By Owner May 15, 2011
awesome idea, i think I shall have to cough up the cash in the near future for this.
kit1 Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2011  Professional Digital Artist
I'm liking this idea. At least you guys get something out of giving some advice. Most professionals are sick of it, because at the end of the day, they take off their respective hats, and they're not at their job any more. But if you happen to be an artist, or lawyer, or anyone in a speciality field, anyone thinks they can come up to you and say 'Hey wow, you're an artist. Would you mind checking out my work/my son Jimmy's work/my nephew Howard's work/and don't forget my sister's friend's grandkids scribbles. They're great, right?' :P
kudlatus Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
Anmph Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011  Professional Traditional Artist
Brilliant idea, but I got married to be talked to like that, and there are no $100 deals in this marriage lol
mmiguelangell Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011   Filmographer
ASS-KISSING! sounds promising!!!
sadwonderland Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2011
Thumbs up on this, bra.

Missed you at Wondercon, so now I must wait in patience to attend a drink and draw at SDCC and witness the reverend firsthand. I really hope the witnessing is free. :)
Casperium Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2011  Professional Digital Artist
Do we get $100.00 if we do the ass kissing on your artwork?? lol... Love it!
seangordonmurphy Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2011
I hear for $200 you can get to sit on Dave's shoulders during a drink and draw session.
sadwonderland Featured By Owner Apr 4, 2011
Oh GREAT, now I have to find some way to save up 200 bucks before San Diego.
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